My Rollercoaster Life
Yes it has been quite awhile since I have blogged in this for well a couple reasons. One being work got horrible busy this summer and my life as well which I didn't mind I was having loads of fun and then the loads of fun stopped by Corey cheating on me and then breaking up with me so yea. id blog all about it but I have talked about it so much with everyone now that I literally cannot talk about it anymore. its very complicated. I should have seen it coming with his ex and all but I was hoping I would have stayed happy this time with him especially after the way he talked about me and our future. basically he wants time apart to be with her to see if things work with her and if they don't he will try us again. I fell in love with him but his heart was always with her no matter how hard I tried so there was no chance for me. I don't think there will be a second chance for us because he's so obsessed with her he will do anything to make it work so I don't know why he didn't make a clean break when he broke up with me. He's only going to marry a girl once so he wants to make sure its the right one was his damn response. What an idiot..
Then I start to hang out with Anthony more who admits he has romantic feelings for me and never thought of me as a friend but he didn't want to interfere because I was really happy with corey. So now I love a guy who's obsessed with his ex which he calls love totally isn't whom I also call Voldemort because I despise her and so does everyone else I hear ha anyhow and Anthony likes me and I still like him but I love corey so much I cant seem to enjoy my time with Anthony. we aren't dating but we are hanging out more. Anything to get my mind of off Corey right now is great. Anyhow that has been my life since the end of September. A lot of tears and freaking out.
Career Wise
Still at the kennel but I have made the decision to apply to The Jackson Laboratory in Bar Harbor. They have a job opening there that is perfect for me to start and the start pay is already more than what I make. I would be able to advance with my degree and experience I have no doubt. The other side to it is I have to move up there and with loans and what not right now I don't know how to do that so before I apply I have to figure out how to live up there on my own and pay for it. I have to sit down and talk to my parents about what to do. I am torn because If I move I say goodbye to everyone, including him for good because neither one of us would move our career for someone well he definitely wouldn't so if I move up there and in a year hes not with her anymore does me being away keep him from trying us again? or do I say no there is no hope hes going to probably marry her and walk away and worry about my own life but miss out on that small possibility of a future for us. I don't know but I do know and its tough. The heart wants what it wants. I cant help it.
Fun Stuff:
Went to Salem on Halloween. Best thing ever! everyone should do it if they love Halloween as much as my friends and I do. Of course im the only one that dressed up but oh well.
Also going to Colorado in December, by myself, to see my brother and sister in law. YAAAAAY!!! also probably going to get another tattoo! I cant wait to see them! I have been going to the gym A LOT. Lost quite a bit of weight so far. I love the gym now, its a complete escape for over an hour about 4 days a week.
<<<THIS IS WHY IM TORN. I LOVE THAT DAMN KID EVEN AFTER HE TURNED ME INTO DAMAGED GOODS>>>
Then I start to hang out with Anthony more who admits he has romantic feelings for me and never thought of me as a friend but he didn't want to interfere because I was really happy with corey. So now I love a guy who's obsessed with his ex which he calls love totally isn't whom I also call Voldemort because I despise her and so does everyone else I hear ha anyhow and Anthony likes me and I still like him but I love corey so much I cant seem to enjoy my time with Anthony. we aren't dating but we are hanging out more. Anything to get my mind of off Corey right now is great. Anyhow that has been my life since the end of September. A lot of tears and freaking out.
Career Wise
Still at the kennel but I have made the decision to apply to The Jackson Laboratory in Bar Harbor. They have a job opening there that is perfect for me to start and the start pay is already more than what I make. I would be able to advance with my degree and experience I have no doubt. The other side to it is I have to move up there and with loans and what not right now I don't know how to do that so before I apply I have to figure out how to live up there on my own and pay for it. I have to sit down and talk to my parents about what to do. I am torn because If I move I say goodbye to everyone, including him for good because neither one of us would move our career for someone well he definitely wouldn't so if I move up there and in a year hes not with her anymore does me being away keep him from trying us again? or do I say no there is no hope hes going to probably marry her and walk away and worry about my own life but miss out on that small possibility of a future for us. I don't know but I do know and its tough. The heart wants what it wants. I cant help it.
Fun Stuff:
Went to Salem on Halloween. Best thing ever! everyone should do it if they love Halloween as much as my friends and I do. Of course im the only one that dressed up but oh well.
Also going to Colorado in December, by myself, to see my brother and sister in law. YAAAAAY!!! also probably going to get another tattoo! I cant wait to see them! I have been going to the gym A LOT. Lost quite a bit of weight so far. I love the gym now, its a complete escape for over an hour about 4 days a week.
<<<THIS IS WHY IM TORN. I LOVE THAT DAMN KID EVEN AFTER HE TURNED ME INTO DAMAGED GOODS>>>
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