Why Do I Even Bother?
I finally opened up last night to him. This is what I said:
And now I feel like i'm in the spot you were in several years ago with her that I am with you. Except a smidge different feelings wise. And she didn't choose an ex over you by uh cheating. But it's similar in a way. And I don't know what's going to happen. I know you don't love me so that's the biggest difference there. And makes a huge difference. And i'm not putting my life on hold but idk it's hard to explain to people. And I know she makes you happy and that's what matters the most. Your happiness. Not who you end up with so whether its her or me. As long as you live a long happy life with someone that's important. Your happiness is what matters to me. You will always hold a special place in my hear no matter what happens in the future. You became one of my best friends when we dated and ive been selfish through this whole break up thing. Whatever happens happens and you will always be a part of my life. and always my panda no one else. Also to be with someone not only who makes you happy but loves you more than you could possibly imagine and would never dream of hurting you. You deserve that. And I know you are going to fight tooth and nail for it to work out with her and if it does I wish you nothing but the best. Trust me I wish every night you'd end up with me but not if we aren't meant to. I cant force something that is or is not meant to be. I will always love you and that will never change. Even when you showed me the worst side of you it didn't change how I felt about you.
His reponse:
......................................................... pretty much nothing. "I don't know what to say and I don't want to talk about it right now. Sorry."
My response:
You've already done the damage and uh pretty much broken me so being able to stand up and be able to say best of luck with the girl you cheated on me with. I hope she makes you feel special every damn day and not hurt you again so you don't feel the pain im going through. Plus other nice things says a lot about me. Like ive said id rather have you in my life as something than not at all. It took a lot of courage. like the lion.
His reponse:
still didn't want to talk about it.
so I said I understand. have a good day at work.
why do I bother. im mean nice thoughtful sweet supportive everything to him and I get what in response.i don't know what he wants from me.ive done everything I can. most exes in this situation would be thrilled to hear them say good luck with the girl you left me for who broke you to begin with in this situation I hope she doesn't hurt you again. seriously even just a thanks for being so nice. damn. I cant do anything right.
BUT on the plus side im going to Colorado in a couple weeks to see my brother!
And now I feel like i'm in the spot you were in several years ago with her that I am with you. Except a smidge different feelings wise. And she didn't choose an ex over you by uh cheating. But it's similar in a way. And I don't know what's going to happen. I know you don't love me so that's the biggest difference there. And makes a huge difference. And i'm not putting my life on hold but idk it's hard to explain to people. And I know she makes you happy and that's what matters the most. Your happiness. Not who you end up with so whether its her or me. As long as you live a long happy life with someone that's important. Your happiness is what matters to me. You will always hold a special place in my hear no matter what happens in the future. You became one of my best friends when we dated and ive been selfish through this whole break up thing. Whatever happens happens and you will always be a part of my life. and always my panda no one else. Also to be with someone not only who makes you happy but loves you more than you could possibly imagine and would never dream of hurting you. You deserve that. And I know you are going to fight tooth and nail for it to work out with her and if it does I wish you nothing but the best. Trust me I wish every night you'd end up with me but not if we aren't meant to. I cant force something that is or is not meant to be. I will always love you and that will never change. Even when you showed me the worst side of you it didn't change how I felt about you.
His reponse:
......................................................... pretty much nothing. "I don't know what to say and I don't want to talk about it right now. Sorry."
My response:
You've already done the damage and uh pretty much broken me so being able to stand up and be able to say best of luck with the girl you cheated on me with. I hope she makes you feel special every damn day and not hurt you again so you don't feel the pain im going through. Plus other nice things says a lot about me. Like ive said id rather have you in my life as something than not at all. It took a lot of courage. like the lion.
His reponse:
still didn't want to talk about it.
so I said I understand. have a good day at work.
why do I bother. im mean nice thoughtful sweet supportive everything to him and I get what in response.i don't know what he wants from me.ive done everything I can. most exes in this situation would be thrilled to hear them say good luck with the girl you left me for who broke you to begin with in this situation I hope she doesn't hurt you again. seriously even just a thanks for being so nice. damn. I cant do anything right.
BUT on the plus side im going to Colorado in a couple weeks to see my brother!
Comments
Post a Comment